In short, this subject is one very near and dear to my heart. Not only because I feel like it's a very important trait for young women to learn. But also because some of my earliest memories of my mother are of her standing in front of her mirror on a sunday morning in a beautiful dress, highheel shoes, and long dangling earings. Blow drying her hair to make it fall gracefully around her shoulders. Then she would turn, look at me and smile her beautiful smile, making me feel like I was the luckiest girl in the world, to have a princess for a mother. Then she woud swiftly yet gracefully go about getting us ready for the day. And all I knew is that I wanted to be just like her.
Now does this mean that I think every women should be like this. Never going outside and always wearing high heel shoes?
Deifinetly not. I for one think that would be rediculous. My sister is more of the "tom-boy" of the family, but still sometimes I can't help but run around with the little kids in the back yard, or throwing on my blue-jeans to work with the guys outside. In fact I think doing these things are a big part of being a lady. There's a happy medium, and women wear many hats.
After writing the first introductory post on this I visited a friend who loaned me a book called....can you guess it? How to Be a Lady....ironic right? In it I found a quote that describes the point of view I'm seeking to portray in these posts."What you are while you are a girl, you will be when you become a woman. 'But, would you have a little girl act like a woman?' Not Precisely. But I would have her act like a lady. Not to put on airs - not to put herself forward, and take the place of a woman before she is big enough to fill it - not to feel above labor, and despise those who perform it - not to look down with scorn upon everything that it common - not to treat with contempt those who cannot dress as well as herself, or have have not seen so much of style and fashion. Those who behave so are pseudo-ladies ( or phony-ladies ). A true lady would despise such meanness. To be a lady, one must behave always with propriety; and be civil, courteous, and kind, to all. To treat any human being with rudeness, would show a want of breeding of which no lady would be guilty. But the romping, roistererous miss, who pays no regard to propriety of conduct, will never be a lady. You will not, however, misunderstand me. Do not suppose that I would have you dull and mopish, never manifesting any gayety of spirit or playfulness of conduct; but, in all these things, I would have you behave with strict regard to propriety."
Long winded as that may seem, he makes a very good point. I think that being a "lady" is sometimes very misunderstood. For instance, as I stated before my sisters and I do enjoy running around outside in blue jeans with the boys. I don't think that's wrong, as long as conduct is maintained.
Conduct must be taught to children ofcourse. And it appears in many different ways.
Manners: I think that this is a good place to start. As children we are taught to say "please" and "thank you", "your welcome" and "excuse me". But should this be the extent of our manners?
Certainly not. In fact these words mean nothing without an attitude of selflessness, politeness and consideration. This is the key, because truthfully, throwing all your mental images of an old, boring, victorian lady asside. In it's essence, being a lady is about character.
Manners and good conduct spring from a heart full of love for those around us, which comes from a heart full of love for Christ. And this is what everything always comes back down too. For love is an action, and it can only be acted out the right way when our hearts are right. After this is done it doesn't matter whether your running around with the little ones, outside with the boys, or inside with the ladies knitting a sweater. You will have discovered the essence of being a lady. And manners will certainly follow.
